I am ready for the next level.Seriously, it is what I egotistically tell people all the time. You know that guy who sits and sees that "they" are making ViewMaster movie, and then wants to blow his brains out, because some dip-shit is getting his VIEWMASTER screenplay made into a movie, while "said guy" is toiling away at a crappy 9 to 5 job? That's me. I'm the one with the .357 in my mouth. Its nickel plated and tastes like flat 7-Up.
Without boring you with my writing credits, I have done a lot. I think a lot of it is pretty good. But I want more. Why? Because there is a dipshit getting a movie made about a fucking ViewMaster. And I, who have ideas that revolve around things OTHER than a 50 year old toy that makes things look like they are in 3-D, am not.
Its all who you know, isn't it? I went to a seminar of Saturday Night Live writers. Someone asked the question: "How you get on Saturday Night Live?"
They answered: "Do you know Tina Fey?"
"No."
"Get to know Tina Fey. We all got hired because we knew Tina Fey."
FUCKING GREAT.
Well I don't know Tina Fey. I don't know anybody. I just know you guys. You my fabulous readers. People who are kind enough to read my drivel I call writing. And I love each and every one of you desperately and truly appreciate all you have done and the time you have invested.
BUT YOU AREN'T TINA FEY, ARE YOU?
Or maybe you are. If so Tina, I love you work. I'd love to send you my 30 Rock Spec script.
But maybe you are just as good as Tina Fey. Maybe you are better. Mr. Spielberg, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull kicked ass! I have a Buck Rogers screenplay I think you should read.
Hell are you the ViewMaster guy? I love your work. I have a Slinky screenplay just up your alley.
Maybe you are not Tina or Steven or the ViewMaster guy. Maybe you know someone? Maybe you know someone who knows someone? Maybe your Dentist has another patient who delivers Thai food to David Lee Roth? Who knows, the world is weird like that.
So since I know you, I want to know who you know. If you know anybody or know anybody who knows anyone who knows of anybody... I want to know.
Got Comedy Central's address for new Talent? I want to know.
Got a buddy who works the mail room at William Morris? I want to know.
Got Tina or Steven or the ViewMaster guy's home address? I want to know
Lindsey Lohan's drug dealer, anything... I WANT TO KNOW.
If you have my e-mail address send it there. Facebook it to me. If not, leave something in the "comments" section with a way to contact you. We will talk.
Thank you very much.
Jason
Well I don't know Tina Fey. I don't know anybody. I just know you guys. You my fabulous readers. People who are kind enough to read my drivel I call writing. And I love each and every one of you desperately and truly appreciate all you have done and the time you have invested.
BUT YOU AREN'T TINA FEY, ARE YOU?
Or maybe you are. If so Tina, I love you work. I'd love to send you my 30 Rock Spec script.
But maybe you are just as good as Tina Fey. Maybe you are better. Mr. Spielberg, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull kicked ass! I have a Buck Rogers screenplay I think you should read.
Hell are you the ViewMaster guy? I love your work. I have a Slinky screenplay just up your alley.
Maybe you are not Tina or Steven or the ViewMaster guy. Maybe you know someone? Maybe you know someone who knows someone? Maybe your Dentist has another patient who delivers Thai food to David Lee Roth? Who knows, the world is weird like that.
So since I know you, I want to know who you know. If you know anybody or know anybody who knows anyone who knows of anybody... I want to know.
Got Comedy Central's address for new Talent? I want to know.
Got a buddy who works the mail room at William Morris? I want to know.
Got Tina or Steven or the ViewMaster guy's home address? I want to know
Lindsey Lohan's drug dealer, anything... I WANT TO KNOW.
If you have my e-mail address send it there. Facebook it to me. If not, leave something in the "comments" section with a way to contact you. We will talk.
Thank you very much.
Jason
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