"Celebrity Sex Rehab with Dr Drew"... Uh Celebrity?

So I watched two TV shows last night. That is actually not true I watched tons of TV last night. But the two shows that really struck me were, Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew and To Catch a Predator Raw.

For the three of you who don’t know, Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew is just like Celebrity Rehab, except the celebrities are sex addicts as opposed to addicted to opiates. ("Opiates" is a term I learned only from watching Celebrity Rehab). So Sex Rehab is filled with such house hold names as Penny Flame, James Lovett, Nicole Narain, Kari Ann Peniche, Kendra Jade Rossi, Duncan Roy, Amber Smith, and Phil Varone.

That is right those people are “celebrities”. Now while I realize that no A, B, C, or D-List actress or actor with aspirations to appear in anything again other than Celebrity Rehab 2, Celebrity Sober House would want to appear on this show. But how can any one in good conscience call these people celebrities? They might as well be the cast of The Real World: Omaha, for all I know. I only know they are celebrities because the show calls them that.

And for nine people I have never heard of, they certainly have a bizarre sense of entitlement. Little did I know that being the ex-drummer of Skid Row or having made a sex tape with a guy on Grey’s Anatomy who is not Patrick Dempsey entitled you to such perks, as not participating in the rehab you signed up for.

It's so stupid. I know people who are more famous than these people and they are not famous at all. One friend of mine was in “How She Move”. That is at least a movie I have heard of. Another friend of mine knows someone who was on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Should these two friends become opiate or sex addicts, I think they are more than qualified to be a “celebrity” on VH-1.

This brings me to someone who should be on Celebrity Sex Rehab with Dr. Drew, John Kennelly. Never heard of John Kennelly, I bet you have. Even if you are not a big fan of the show he is on, or have seen it, I bet a friend of yours has and told you about it.

John Kennelly was on one of the first Dateline NBC’s To Catch a Predator. I consider him the star of this episode. For the 5 people who don’t know about To Catch a Predator, here is the story. This group called Perverted Justice goes on line posing as underage teens to and tries to root out adults who are trying to meet up and have sex with said underage teens. They then set up a meeting at a house, where Chris Hanson and Dateline meet these guys and record it for the show.

Of this group of sick dirt bags, John Kennelly is a special case. In his episode, he showed up naked at the Dateline house and sat in the kitchen. Chris Hanson comes in and reads him his transcript of what he said in his online chat and confronts him about his intentions. The segment ends with him putting on his underwear and leaving the house.

That would normally be it, but in the next segment, you find out the next day, that the same guy, John Kennelly is back in the chat rooms again. He is after another underage teen boy, and has set up another meeting at a local McDonalds. So Chris Hanson and Dateline show up and confront him again. It’s unreal.

So I am watching this episode last night with my girlfriend, and I just yell out at the screen, “Now this guy should be on Sex Rehab!” And then it hit me, HE COULD.

If we go by the VH-1 “celebrity” qualifiers, he certainly fits the bill:

a) Been on TV before? Check
b) Has a sexual issue and needs help? Check

c) He is someone most people have never heard of? DOUBLE CHECK

I guess the only thing keeping him from being on Sex Rehab is that he is not some guilt ridden former porn star. No he actually has a sick and twisted sexual problem and probably deserves to be in jail rather than being pampered on a reality show.

But who knows, James Lovett got on.

Jason