This is something I have to remind myself. Having had a blog now for 8-9 months, I get myself into the mindset sometimes of “Ooh I should blog about that”. This has sort of become my outlet for the hot button topics buzzing around my head.I have found that writing an entry usually revolves around my being irritated or mad about something. Or I am just shamelessly plugging something. But when I am not shilling, yes, if I am blogging about it, I am probably pissed.
Because I have to be “mad” to write one, there has to be an awful lot of editing going on. I recently was going through some drafts of things I had started and didn’t for what ever reason didn’t finish. Glad I did. Seems like in my fury to write a blog, I didn’t THINK first. Wow there was a lot of stuff I was like… “Whoa, you were going to post that on the internet?!”
I usually try not to use anyone’s name, except mine. Of course if you know me, you know who my girlfriend, father, sister and so on are anyway. But in my fantasy world, “strangers” read this and I like to keep their potential embarrassment to a minimum. Along those same lines though, I didn’t bare in mind that my regulars might also recognize some other people in my life. Luckily I had some sense and didn’t publish them on the internet.
As Tina Fey once said to Alanis Morissette “Just because it’s in your journal, doesn’t mean it’s a song.” Well that is advice I need to remember to follow. And to remind myself what could have happened, here is a list of just the headlines of blogs I wrote in my anger that luckily I did not post. I have replaced the names of people in my life with the name of someone I have never met and do not know of “Dan Harrison.”
FUCK YOU DAN HARRISON!!
NEWS FLASH: MY DAN HARRISON IS AN IDIOT.
IF YOU FIND DAN HARRISON DEAD TOMORROW I DID IT! AND HERE IS THE REASON WHY!!
EAT SHIT AND DIE DAN HARRISON!!!
I CAN’T BELIEVE DAN HARRISON IS SO STUPID SHE DOESN’T KNOW HER BOYFRIEND IS GAY!!
SCANDAL: DAN HARRISON IS FUCKING DAN HARRISON!!! OMG!!!
THEY ARE GONNA FIRE DAN HARRISON TOMORROW AND HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW.
IF DAN HARRISON DOESN’T TELL HIS GIRLFRIEND HE GOT HERPES FROM THAT STRIPPER, I WILL.
I HATE ALL FOUR OF DAN HARRISON’S KIDS, BUT I ESPECIALLY HATE HIS MIDDLE CHILD, DAN HARRISON.
JUST GAVE A LOAN TO DAN HARRISON. THAT IS $50 BUCKS I WILL NEVER SEE AGAIN!!
GRANDPARENT AT 36! NICE PARENTING DAN HARRISON.
PALIN OVER OBAMA?!? I AM ASHAMED I SHARE DNA WITH DAN HARRISON
THAT’S IT!! I AM TELLING DAN HARRISON THAT DAN HARRISON IS STEALING FROM THE COMPANY.
I BLAME MY FARTS ON DAN HARRISON’S DOG.
I CAN’T BELIEVE DAN HARRISON WENT HOME WITH DAN HARRISON!!
IS DAN HARRISON RETARDED OR DID HIS PARENTS JUST DROP HIM ON HIS HEAD?
SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHO THE FATHER IS?!? DAN HARRISON IS SUCH A SLUT!!
PLEASE STOP TELLING ME ABOUT YOUR SEX LIFE, ESPECIALLY THE PART ABOUT HOW YOU FUCKED MY DAN HARRISON!
WHAT KIND OF IDIOT BURNS THROUGH THEIR PAYCHECK TO BUY COKE? ANSWER: DAN HARRISON.
I DON’T CARE ABOUT THE MITIGATING CIRCUMSTANCES, DAN HARRISON IS A RAPIST!
LIFE COULD BE WORSE. I COULD BE DAN HARRISON!
Wow it feels so good to get all that off my chest and off my blog. I just need to be more careful. Take some time and just think these things through, before I go off and write some embarrassing about… Dan Harrison.
Jason
I know the father of my child, so at least I'm not THAT Dan Harrison, but you're right, I'm keeping that $50
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